Overheard at Our House

"Wow, I bet they wish they had covered that up better."

"You know who covers stuff up really well? The mob."

"I know, right?"

"I mean, what was Uncle Larry even supposed to be doing up on that roof the night before he was set to testify?"

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"We didn't raise you like this. It wasn't until you went to college that you got into air conditioning."

"Air conditioning is what, the gateway drug to cable television?"

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"When you go to get your hair cut, there should be an application. And if you don't check the mullet box, you should not get a mullet!"