Friday Fun Day

Happy Easter!!

The night before Easter, Connor got ready for bed and declared that he was going to fall asleep as fast as possible so that when we woke up in the morning it would be Easter.  Then he asked me if it was all right for him to wake everyone up early.  After some negotiations, we settled on no sooner than 6:00 AM.  Of course, he woke up at 4:00, but he let the rest of us sleep until 6:00.  And by the time he woke us up, he was really ready for his basket and to hunt for all the eggs.

The boys each got a new squirt gun in their basket.

Well, that escalated quickly.

My mom sent some Star Wars chocolate eggs with figures from the movie Rogue One inside.

No, no one knows what happened to their legs.  Also, before we realized that they were supposed to be Star Wars figurines, and only the Captain Cassian figurine had been discovered, we were trying to make sense of him in terms of Easter.  I mean, it's not obvious that he is from Star Wars.  And thus, Machine Gun Jesus was born and made a part of our Easter celebrations this year.

For the record, the kid's memory verses sound a lot funnier when a machine-gun-wielding Jesus is pretending to say them.

Also, according to Lex, in the battle between Darth Vader and Machine Gun Jesus, Machine Gun Jesus is the winner.

Of course, we also had plenty of candy and Pokemon cards.

Lex actually lost another tooth while eating jelly beans!  

That's two teeth in one Easter weekend.

All I want for Easter is my two front teeth.

The Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny are taking it in turns to visit our house this weekend.

Happy Easter!!

American Goth Stick

Connor drew an amazing picture today on the back of one of his school papers.  He's got a really great sense of humor.

You can click on the photo to enlarge it.

The First Week of School is Done!

These are the library books that we read this week for school.  Clearly we are working on an outer space unit.

Otter in Space was definitely a favorite.  Lex loved Pig and Pug, and he read it over and over, all by himself.

My favorite was the Great Big Book of Spacey Snakey Buggy Riddles.  I love jokes for little kids.  They are so bad that they are usually good.

Joke Time with Connor and Lex

I think this video is pretty clear and easy to understand:



But this one might need a little translation:


His joke is this:

One day an officer sees a man out walking a lion.  

"Hey, you can't walk that lion here.  You need to take him to the zoo," he says.  

"Sure thing, officer," says the man.

The next day, the officer sees the same man walking the same lion.

"I thought I told you to take that lion to the zoo!"

"I did," the man replied.  "And today I am taking him to the movies."

Anything funny must be a knock-knock joke

So my kids really like the movie Atlantis.  There is one part, in particular, that they find really funny, and they run around quoting it to each other all the time to make themselves laugh until they are blue in the face.

The funny bit, it goes something like this:

Trustee #1:  "I swear that Thatch gets crazier every year."

Trustee #2:  "If I ever hear the word Atlantis again, I'll step in front of a bus."

Trustee #1:  "I'll push you!"

Trustee #2:  "Good lord!  There he is!"

That's how Connor recites the bit, and then Lex and he will laugh and laugh.  Sometimes they'll ask me to recite it for them.  When I do, they fall on the floor.

Lex knows it, too.  Only he always starts is like this:

"Knock, knock.  If I ever hear the word Atlantis again, I'll step in front of a bus.  I'll push you!  Oh good lord!  There he is!" 

Because if something is funny, then it must be a joke.  And if it is a joke, then it must start with "Knock, knock."  I mean, right?

Missing Punchlines

Connor tells the funniest jokes.  Often he makes up his own.  He always has great openings for jokes, but sometimes he doesn't have a punchline yet.  That doesn't stop him from telling the opening.  And we'll still laugh.  Because somehow listening to him set up joke after joke after joke, without finishing any of them, is actually pretty funny.  I think it's because he's got such good comedic timing that he doesn't need the punchline.

But I still really wish I knew the ending of some of his jokes, like these:

How do you make a crocodile dance?

How do you turn a caboose into a moose?

What does a pilgrim say when he has to go potty?

What is the fight song for the Indians?

What does one pirate say to another pirate after he eats a fish for dinner?


Please finish these jokes someday soon, okay, Connor?

A Joke!

Connor is a Funny Kid

When we went to the farm, part of the preschool programming included farm animal jokes. Connor was in preschool-joke-heaven!

For each animal, the instructor would ask the kids if they had any jokes to share. Connor raised his hand for each and every animal, and he was finally called upon for the pig joke. This is what he came up with:

"Why did the pig cross the road? To get to the other side!"

I was proud of him!

He is really really really good at coming up with hilarious jokes, but he usually has trouble with the punch lines.

Here are some of his unfinished jokes:

1. What do you call an upside-down pig?

2. Why did the chicken go to the top of the CN Tower?

3. Where do you take a sick chicken?

4. Why did the cow cross the road?

5. Why did the chicken cross the ceiling?

He usually cracks us up, beginning joke after joke, but never really finishing a lot of them. But I promise, just the beginning of his jokes are funny. I can't wait until he starts coming up with entire jokes that are funny.

Here are some of the new farm animal jokes that he learned at the farm:

1. Why did the farmer take oats to bed with him? To feed his night-mares.

2. Where do you take a sick horse? To the horsepital.

3. Where do sheep go to get a hair cut? To the baa-baa shop.

4. Why did the turkey cross the road? To prove that he wasn't chicken!

Hahahaha!

Connor Does Stand Up

Submit Your Jokes Here!

Connor likes to tell jokes, but it turns out that you have to learn a joke before you can tell a joke.

So, I've been trying to teach him some jokes.

I've taught him two chicken jokes: Why did the chicken cross the road? (To get to the other side!) ...and... Why did the chicken cross the playground? (To get to the other slide!)

I've also taught him this one: What has hands but cannot clap? A clock!

I've tried teaching him numerous knock-knock jokes, but the other day, he demonstrated that he doesn't quite get those ones yet.

We were sitting at the table, and this is what happened:

Connor: Knock knock.
Me: Who's there?
Connor: Points at himself.
Me: Laughter. Because it is kinda funny.

Connor: Knock knock.
Me: Who's there?
Connor: Points at Lex.
Me: Laughter. Because Connor cracks me up.

Connor: Knock knock.
Me: Who's there?
Connor: Points at me.
Me: Laughter. Because I am apparently having an existential moment.


Last night in the car, he had Daddy cracking up with these ones:

• How did the chicken cross the road to get to the other side?
• How did the chicken cross the playground to get to the other slide?
• How did the chicken climb up on the fire truck without his fire suit, helmet and boots?
• How did the chicken ride in the ambulance without his ambulance suit?
• How did the chicken ride on the dump truck without his hat-you-know-the-ones-they-wear-on-construction-sites?

You get the idea.

Each time, Daddy would say, "I don't know, Connor, how?" But Connor would have no answer and just move on to the next joke. Because that one was already done, Daddy.


After that, Kevin realized that Connor wants to be funny, but that we have to help guide him a little bit. Therefore, I've now been put in charge of teaching Connor jokes. (Good, because I like to make it official that that's what I've been trying to do anyways.)


Please help me. Do you have any good jokes that I can teach Connor? If so, leave them for me in a comment below. Your help will make my child funnier!


Thanks,

Julie

P.S. These pictures don't really have anything to do with this post, except for the fact that I like them.

P.P.S. Matchy-matchy outfits from Carters.