I guess I need to vent a bit

I've been in a pretty bad mood all week. I just can't help it. Kevin tried to cheer me up last night, but it really didn't work.

We watched Date Movie last night. You know, the movie from "2 of the 6 creators of Scary Movie." Well, they apparently weren't my favorite "2 of the 6 creators of Scary Movie," because it really stunk. And it didn't stink just because I was in a bad mood; Kevin didn't like it either. At one point I had to leave the room because it was so gross that I almost threw up!

I will admit that I almost threw up when I was making dinner last night, too. Kevin had to finish mixing the meatloaf that I had started because I was totally grossed out. And I can't remember if I made it correctly or not, being distracted by the gross-out factor, but it didn't taste very good, and Kevin didn't like it either. So, I don't think we will be eating meatloaf again for awhile.

I think that I'm pregnant, but I don't feel like taking a test. I took a test about two weeks ago, and it didn't work at all, so I couldn't tell. I bought the test at Wal-Mart, and I think maybe it had gotten wet or damaged in the box, or maybe it was just inferior because it was so cheap. But, there was supposed to be a (-) for not pregnant or a (+) for pregnant, and nothing ever showed up at all. But I don't feel like checking again, because I don't want to be disappointed and worry about why I'm late and feel like crap if I am not pregnant, and I don't feel like dealing with it if I am pregnant. Which is weird. Because last week I would have given anything to be pregnant, and this week, I just don't want to know.

Other things are stressing me out, too. We started painting the small bedroom yellow, for the baby's room. Kevin and I painted the ceiling together, and then he said he didn't want me to paint any more because of the fumes. This was a few weeks ago. The room stayed all torn up, with junk strewn all over the second floor of our house. It's still kinda like that now. Well, about a week ago, Kevin got around to putting up the first coat of yellow paint. It still needs a second coat of yellow paint, but at first he wanted to wait until after this weekend, because his family *might* be coming to stay with us, and he didn't want Kris or Kyle to sleep in a room with paint fumes. (I'm also irritated by the fact that today is Friday, and we still don't know if they are coming to stay with us this weekend, because they haven't decided yet.) So last night, he started packing all the paint things up, and then he told me that he thinks that he is going to wait until spring to put on the second coat of yellow paint, because it is getting too cold out to leave the windows open for ventillation. Which I understand, but it upsets me.

Then, he took the blinds and curtains down from our bedroom window when it was leaking earlier this week, and he hasn't had a chance to fix the window yet, so they are still down. And I don't sleep well because of the light from outside. I've gotten used to sleeping in our pitch black room. Plus, the floor in our bedroom is covred with blinds, curtains, rods, and tools, so it isn't very cozy and inviting anymore.

And I am being driven crazy by the window screens that are scattered everywhere from the window projects, the three computers that are taking up my dinning room table because they need fixed (hopefully we will get the operating system we bought this weekend if his family comes to visit), and the papers and books that are strewn all over the basement because Kevin started to go through them to organize them, but never had a chance to put them away. I am also irritated with myself for being irritated at all these things, but I just can't help it. I feel like a pig.

Plus, I'm always hungry and I've been eating a bunch more than usual, but I still only weigh 110 pounds, but some of my clothes aren't fitting right anymore. And that's just aggravating.

And even though I'm not sore from Dodgeball anymore, my breasts still hurt. And my birthday is coming up and I don't want to get any older, and I don't want to be disappointed by whatever it is that my mom buys me.

See what a bitch I am being? I don't know how to make it stop.